Previously on The Vampire Diaries, Season One…Part II
Welcome back to our series recapping what you may remember (or may have missed) of Season 1 of the freight train that is The Vampire Diaries. Where last we left our fearless/fearful/fear-instilling heroes, shit was ‘bout to start hitting the fan. And because of it, these episodes are pretty beefy. Just like our men! What? I said it. Stefan and Damon are vampires, Elena knows, Vicki is dead, and Jeremy is sad, as per always. ONWARD HO!
Stefan’s vampire-bff, Lexi, comes to celebrate his b-day! Hooray! Lexi and Stefan are OLD friends, who apparently partied with Bon Jovi in the 80s. Awesome. Meanwhile, due to Damon’s help, Jeremy has – cold turkey, I might add – stopped doing drugs, and started doing his homework in the wake of Vicki’s death, which Elena and Aunt Jenna find odd. Across town, Damon brings the Sheriff a box of vervain, and she lists all the vampire hunters in town (namely, the Founders Council). Over at la Casa de Gilbert, Bonnie rips open one of Elena’s pillows, and Elena’s all “bitch, you owe me a feather pillow!” But Bonnie has a purpose; Grams showed her how to make shit float! Damon gets Caroline to throw a party at the Mystic Grill, and convinces Stefan and Lexi to go. Elena goes to the SBH to confront Stefan, but instead finds a towel-clad Lexi. Elena is immediately jealous because, well, STOP ENCROACHING ON HER MAN, YO! DIBS! Even though she told Stefan to stay away from her. But Stefan explains it’s all just a misunderstanding. At the Grill, Lexi helps Elena realize that she’s actually in love with Stefan and gain the courage to rekindle their lurve. Outside, another townie has done been murdered a la the “animal” attacks from earlier in the season. And it’s totes Damon! But he frames Lexi, and the police vervain her. Damon stakes her right in the ticker before she can attack the sheriff. Understandably upset, Stefan tells Elena that she was right for ending things with him; then rushes off to get even with Damon, but stops before killing him as repayment for saving him from Logan! Back on Witch Mountain, Bonnie falls asleep wearing the amber crystal… and wakes up in the cemetery! WHAT?! I KNOW!
Good news, MFHS! Looks like you’re getting a new history teacher! Mr. Alaric Saltzman, COME ON DOWN! He’s replacing the recently deceased Mr. Tanner (still don’t care). BAM! SHIRTLESS STEFAN! During their little extra-credit meeting, Jeremy notices Ric’s ring, which resembles the ones Stefan and Damon wear. Mental note that, folks! Damon tries again, in vain (vein… PUN!) to get the crystal from Bonnie. After school, Bonnie chucks the godforsaken crystal into a field, but it magically reappears in her bag later! WEIRD! Jeremy introduces Alaric to his Aunt Jenna, who immediately becomes infatuated with him because she is a teenager and not a responsible parental figure. Since Bonnie’s having dreams about her ancestor Kendra the Vampire Slayer Emily (former owner of the amber crystal), the girls decides to hold a séance. Emily takes this opportunity to possess Bonnie’s body. Meanwhile, Damon tells Stefan that he wants to resurrect Katherine with the help of the crystal, which Kat gave to Emily. On their way to the Tomb, Damon sees Bonemily, and reminds her of the deal they made 150 years ago: Damon will protect Emily’s family line if Emily protects Katherine. Damon tries to go for the crystal, which is needed to open the tomb, but Bonemily IMPALES HIM ON A BRANCH. Word. You see, Emily is responsible for keeping all the vamps in suspended animation in the Tomb. What vamps you ask? Why, all the other vamps who the long-ago MF residents tried to burn alive, but are actually being held prisoner in the Tomb – with Kat! Stefan and Bonemily fear that if the tomb is opened, they will be out for brains revenge! Bonemily performs a ritual to destroy the crystal, and turns into Bonnie again. Furious, Damon attacks her, but Stefan saves her by having her drink his blood. You won’t find THAT in a first aid kit! Back in the cemetery, Damon is all teary-eyed that Katherine is lost to him forever. Huh, he has a vulnerable side. Who knew?! Bonnie is now terrified of Stefan. Stefan tells Elena he’s leaving town because he’s nothing but trouble; she begs him to stay. ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME CRY, EPISODE?! Meanwhile, Logan has returned – now a vamp – and tries to get Jenna to invite him in. But no dice, thank god. Is he ever going to just go away? I mean, what purpose does he serve? Up in Elena’s room, she and Bonnie comfort each other and cry in each others’ arms. I’m warning you, episode.
Tonight, on a very special episode of The Vampire Diaries, Jeremy decides to pick up the hobby of sketching fantasy creatures (like every other angsty teenage boy) that he hasn’t done since his parents died – is it me, or are they all vampires? Oh the irony! Meanwhile, in Crazytown, Logan attacks and kills several people. Stefan tries to get Damon to pick somewhere to go. Damon suggests they try out for “The Amazing Race.” If they did, I would SO finally maybe watch an episode. The Sheriff (who totes has a crush on Damon. DON’T HATE) tells Damon about the recent attacks, and he decides to track this mysterious new vampire. Matt and Caroline continue to be the only people who will give each other the time of day. Aww. He even tells Tyler that he enjoys it! DoubleAww. Damon finds Logan, who claims to have no idea who turned him. Logan tells Damon about the journals the Founders Council have that tell them all about vampires, but then incapacitates Damon and gets away. After tossing a few threats at the Sheriff, Logan lures Caroline into his car with his bedroom eyes, and Stefan and Damon have to save her. Logan tells Damon he knows of another way to get into the Tomb. Back at the SBH, Elena tells Stefan that she loves him, and they kiss! Whee! Elena tells him not to hide his crazy vamp eyes from her, and they decide that it’s TIME FOR THE SEX. In other vampy news, Logan tries to attack Alaric when he tells him to leave Jenna alone, and Logan gets himself staked. While Stefan is downstairs getting Elena a post-coital drink, she finds the photograph of Katherine, sees how EERILY similar they look, and one-night-stands it out of the house, leaving behind her pearl vervain necklace. On some random back road, Elena crashes her giant SUV after hitting a man in the middle of the road, causing Ryan Phillipe to bash his head on the roof of the car. As Elena is still strapped in her upside-down car, the not-so-human dude walks toward her. Cue the scream. Cut to black. ELENA NOOOO!
Oh, whew! Damon to the rescue. When he arrives, the stranger leaves, and Damon frees Elena from the overturned car. He then unceremoniously kidnaps her to Georgia in search of some chick named Bree whom he finds at a bar. Back in Mystic Falls, Alaric flashes back to his wife who was lured away by vampires. In GA, Bree turns out to be pretty bad ass. She and Damon apparently have a history. LUCKY! Back in Mystic Falls again, Jeremy meets Anna, a mousy little homeschool girl who seems to know the REAL truth about the history of Mystic Falls. Bonnie seems to have lost her groove and goes to her Grams to get it back. Once in the magical cemetery, Bonnie falls through the ground and finds the Tomb. Speaking of witches, Bree is one, and Damon hopes she can help him open the tomb to get Katherine back. But while Damon’s back is turned, Bree, who was Lexi’s friend, calls Lee, Lexi’s boyfriend, who wants brains revenge! Lee snatches Elena, and Damon gives chase. Elena manages to get Lee to leave, and Damon kills Bree (after she tells him the way in the Tomb is in Emily’s spellbook). When Elena and Damon return to MF, Stefan reveals that he saved Elena from the car crash that killed her parents. Stefan, who is a wealth of information tonight, also tells her that she was adopted, though he does not know who her bio parents are. He tells her that he loves her, and she forgives him. Back at the Mystic Grill, Alaric spots Damon and recognizes him… as the vampire who killed his wife! Do do do doo Do do do doo!
The dude who Elena almost killed? Yeah, he’s stalking her now (no it’s not Edward Cullen). Over at the Grill, where Matt now works, there appears to be a new bartender, Ben. He’s not really new, as he’s actually a recent MFHS grad, who was apparently a pretty big football star. When Damon is bothering Bonnie, Ben saves her and they flirt. Elena gets Jenna to tell her the story of how Dr. Gilbert took her in when her mother gave birth to her and cut town. The only other thing she knows is that bio-mom’s name was Isobel. Back at the Grill, Bonnie’s all into Ben, but Matt gets all mopey when he overhears Caroline make a remark about how Ben is just a “washed-up jock” who slings drinks for a living – which natch means that’s what she thinks Matt will be! Duh! Meanwhile, Anna keeps being creepy and hanging around Jeremy – unbeknownst to him, she wants that Gilbert journal too. When she goes to steal it from Alaric’s classroom, she runs into Edward Cullen Elena’s vamp-stalker, who apparently knew Katherine. He lures Elena into a teacher’s lounge-esque room and she stabs him with a bunch of pencils (#2, I hope!). This does not deter him so the Brothers Salvatore STAKE HIM. Damn. But before he dies, he reveals that the way into the Tomb can be found in the suddenly very popular Gilbert journal. Jeez, it’s like goddamn Twilight (mad ramblings and all!). Over in Sluttyauntville, Jenna and Alaric walk home from this episode’s theme party/dance (in Mystic Falls? NO!). When he leaves her at her door, he tells her that his wife’s name was Isobel. Hmm, that name sounds familiar… almost like I mentioned it a mere 11 sentences ago. Weird. Back across town, Matt and Caroline make up. Also, we learn that Ben and Anna are vampires. And they’re romantically involved?! Gross. Anyone else feel dirty?
Hey, Flashback! It’s 1864, and Katherine and a still-human Damon are in the middle of the road. Innocent-looking Katherine stops a carriage, attacks and feeds on the people in it. Then she lays the smooch on Damon. The scene cuts to Damon interrupting Stefan and Elena in bed. He scoffs at Elena’s modesty, promising to throw a dollar at anything he hasn’t seen before. Hee. He reminds them that he needs Emily’s spellbook or grimoire, and that he can be trusted, and we – cut back to 1864! Katherine is seducing Stefan in bed. Some chick named Pearl (who is Anna’s mama! Or at least a motherly guardian…) shows up to warn Katherine that the townspeople are on to them. Back in present day, Alaric is reading the journal and we see Dexter’s dad Giuseppe Salvatore talking with Johnathan Gilbert and Mayor Lockwood about their pesky vampire problem. While reading, Ric sees a figure, and goes to get his handy-dandy stake-firing crossbow. Shit’s hardcore, yo. He almost shoots Stefan, but he CATCHES IT – and gives Ric a stare from Hell. Woo! Anyone else have goosebumps? Anna manages to steal the journal (that sneaky bitch), but not before Alaric manages to make copies of it. Back in Historical Williamsburg, Stefan and Damon walk with their father who reveals that Damon is a disappointment to him – he doesn’t know if he will work for the “cause.” Back in the present, Stefan and Damon are desperate to get a hold of the Gilbert journal (which will tell where there grimoire is). While searching, Stefan learns that Ric is there to kill Damon, but warns him against it. You best listen, Ric!
In another flashback (I’m getting dizzy!), Damon is afraid that their father will kill Kat if he ever finds out, but Stefan says he can be trusted. Oh, foreshadowing! In 2009, Stefan takes the photocopied pages back to Elena’s house to study. And by “study” I mean have a flashback and then a revelation that he must dig up his father’s grave, natch. Apparently Emily’s grimoire was buried there, so he and Elena take a field trip. Back in Prettytown, I mean, near Damon, we find out that Anna is also looking for the grimoire to set free her mother and the other vamps trapped in the Tomb. Over on the set of Love Connection: the Supernatural Edition, Bonnie’s date with Ben turns sour when she realizes he’s a vampire! Gasp! Damon, having figured out where the grimoire is too, heads to the cemetery and finds Stefan and Elena already there with the book. After Damon establishes that neither of them can be trusted, he force-feeds Elena some of his blood and threatens to kill her. Stefan lets him have the book and takes Elena home. When he goes downstairs to get her aspirin, he finds out that Anna is there. When he runs back up stairs… ELENA IS GONE!! You’re 0 for 2, Stefan. You really should stop leaving Elena unattended in the upstairs of houses…
When Elena comes to, she realizes she and Bonnie have been kidnapped and brought to a dank motel room by Anna and Ben. Stefan has been trying to track them down, but Damon refuses to help. Damon goes to Grams’ looking for Bonnie, and she tells him to leave and totes gives him a piercing headache WITH HER MIND! She’s so awesome. Stefan locates the girls and busts in the motel room all badass and threatens to kill Ben if he doesn’t leave town, like, now. Grams agrees to help them open the Tomb – but only to get Katherine; they must burn all the others. Elena tells Damon that Bonnie is going to help, but Damon doesn’t trust her, so she takes off her vervain to let him try to compel her. He puts her vervain back on and tells her he trusts her. It’s actually very sweet, aww. Jeremy gets Anna to come to the cemetery with him, not knowing that she has her own reasons for being there. Stefan, still all touchy from the guilt of letting down Damon 150 years ago, sets Ben ON FIRE for not leaving town. Grams and Bonnie open the tomb. Anna goes in to find her mom, and Grams tells Bonnie that they only partially unsealed the Tomb, so none of the vamps can come out. Anna finds her mama and helps her reanimate by feeding her Elena’s blood. Stefan goes in when he hears Elena scream, so now that Stefan is trapped, Bonnie gets Grams to help her unseal it completely. Damon also discovers that Katherine is not there! WHAT?! All this for nothing?! Elena pleads and gets both boys to follow her to the door. Once outside, Elena sees how upset Damon is and comforts him. Later, Damon confronts Anna and Pearl, and learns that an infatuated guard let Katherine go during the church fire, and she was NEVER inside the Tomb. Anna tells him that she saw Katherine in Chicago in 1983, and that she seemed meh about Damon. Back at home, Bonnie checks on Grams, but NOGODWHY the strain of opening the tomb was too much, and Grams is dead. WHITLEY, NOOOOO! DAMN YOU, EPISODE! At the very end, we see the remaining vampires escaping the tomb! OH MY WORLD IS CRUMBLING DOWN AROUND ME!!
Well, jeez. What a cliffhanger, amiright?! This is exactly where they left viewers off for like almost two months. But don’t worry. We won’t make you wait that long for the next set of recaps. And you’ll def want to come back then. Believe me, shit is just starting to get intense! Like, you don’t know what intense EVEN IS yet. Next time on The Vampire Diaries recaps… Damon and Alaric form a bromance for the ages, Matt’s absentee mother returns for a guest starring role in his life, Elena and Jeremy’s uncle John (a.k.a. Uncle Creeper) comes back to town, and perhaps the most shocking of all… MORE RANDOM AND UNSOLICITED FOUNDERS-RELATED CELEBRATIONS!! Until then…