I don’t know about you guys, but we here at the SBH seem to be kind of blah about last night’s ep. It wasn’t a very exciting, plot-driven episode. I think it was a lot about setting up what’s to come. But we just had a hard time getting excited about it. We liked Alaric, and despite the fact that he wasn’t even in the episode, Klaus somehow managed to dominate our discussion in our first section. As he should. Because he is awesome. But you’ll read our thoughts in a moment. Don’t forget to let us know what YOU thought about it in the comments!
Main Players: Cin, Christina (SBH staff); Dayna, Erin, and Stephanie (SBH contributors and friends).
Damon, I will straight up murder you…
Christina: If you use that fucking sign to kill Elijah OR Klaus. STRAIGHT. UP.
Dayna: Fucking right!!! Although, I can see them eventually killing Klaus. I like him, and I like JoMo, but it would make sense. Storywise, I think he kind of has to die in the end. Elijah, though… FUCKING DEATH TO WHOEVER KILLS ELIJAH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cin: For serious, that’s my total line in the sand with this show. They are building sand castles as it is. Although, I do take some comfort in the fact that Damon’s plans almost always don’t work out and the Originals are better than they are. Although the linked thing worries the hell out of me, but you guys they CAN NOT kill Klaus when he hasn’t even been around the last 2 stupid episodes and they had BETTER NOT EVER kill Elijah. *deep breath* I just – UGH!!!
Erin: I miss Klaus. If we are supposed to be hating him at this point, the writers have failed. How can you want that guy dead? I just want him to make out with Caroline and live happily ever after forever.
Cin: I totally agree, Erin. It’s something we talked about about at length in the “All My Children” post – but they have really written themselves into a corner with the Originals. The audience likes them more than the leads at this point – as well they should b/c they are better characters. So how can we root for the leads when they are in conflict with what is like way better and more awesome? I know I can’t even THINK about wishing Stefan & Damon luck on their Original crusade. Like, at all.
Christina: WORD. Hence the title of this section.
Dayna: I like the idea that there is SOMETHING about Klaus that intrigues Caroline, but I would totally lose respect for her if she just completely chose Klaus after everything that’s gone down. It would backtrack over all the growth she’s had since season one, and ruin the character for me.
Christina: I know what you mean, but if that something intrigues her, and she gets to know him and she eventually forgives him (for some not all), I still think they could maybe live happily ever after. I would TOTALLY be behind that. And I don’t think that it would undermine her growth at all. I think her being with Tyler undermines that. Remember how awesome she was at the beginning of Season 2 when she first transitioned? She REMAINED awesome… until she got together with Tyler. Then suddenly she was the OLD Caroline, who was superficial, and the super organizer. And not that she can’t organize town events anymore, but she was the boy-obsessed Caroline she used to be. But then Klaus made her realize that she can be so much more than that, and she’s been getting better (not to mention Tyler is nowhere to be found). I think being with Klaus woudl HELP her become an even better version of herself than she already is.
Erin: The way I look at it is this: Tyler was for the lost little girl Caroline used to be and Klaus is for the amazing woman she has grown into. I am still having a hard time finding things that Klaus has done that Stefan, Damon and many others haven’t also done. Killing, lying, manipulating. They are all guilty of it. But why is it SO much worse if it’s Klaus?
Christina: WORD to you too! I don’t know why Klaus is worse. I mean… besides siccing Tyler on her, what he has done to her? Am I forgetting something? And maybe this is callous of me, but she was a casualty of what Klaus was trying to do. It doesn’t make hurting her wrong, but again… the morality of the characters on this show. Mystic Falls is NOT a Utopia… as much as the Founding Families/Founders’ Council want it to be. No one is perfect. No one is infallible. People make mistakes. And I think that Klaus realizes his — surely he does. He fancies her does he?! *cue the collective SBH swoon*
Dayna: One thing the characters on this show have demonstrated is that they’re not operating on a strict moral code, but that they’re mostly loyal to those they consider their own. It’s not that Klaus has done worse things than the others — all the vamps have killed and compelled people — it’s that Klaus has done it to everyone in Caroline’s “own” group. She is loyal to a fault; for her to overlook how Klaus has treated her circle of friends and get romantic with him would lower her esteem in my eyes.
Erin: Hey. Remember that time Damon was the big villain and everyone still wanted Elena to hook up with him?
Dayna: Caroline didn’t. She, more than anyone, is loyal to her friends. Unless Klaus turns over a totally new leaf, having them as endgame just doesn’t work for me.
Stefan’s (Sorta) In Control
Dayna: I love how the whole thing is STILL Damon’s fault, according to Elena. Nevermind that he’s totally right about the yo-yo dieting and whatnot.
Christina: Stress eating. LOLZ.
Stephanie: At least he doesn’t have to worry about it going straight to his thighs.
Erin: So ready for him to scream at Elena again. Why does she insist on holding him to impossibly high standards?
Dayna: And then blame Damon when Stefan doesn’t meet those standards.
Cin: Right?!? I already unleashed on her judgey hypocritical crap in the other sections but I’m seriously just so f-ing tired of her crap. She judges Damon and Stefan but not Alaric? Because he can’t help it and THEY CAN? At this point I can’t ship her with either one of the brothers, and don’t think I ever will again. She’s turned into Bonnie.
Christina: I can’t even get into that right now, Cin. I seriously… I’m tired of Elena [Stephanie: So fucking tired of her.]. But back to Stefan… the fact that he was able to control himself enough when Meredith tried to off herself was pretty impressive. I hope Elena fucking sees it for what it is instead of picking and choosing what she pays attention to here. Dammit, I was trying not to bring her into this. I don’t know why I’m so interested in getting Elena to forgive Stefan, or at least understand that he’s NOT as bad a guy as she INSISTS on making him… I’m with you, Cin. I don’t ship her with anyone anymore. I ship her with Bonnie. Tied together. To a cement block. In a sinking ship.
Cin: Hahahahaha, YES!
Erin: Elena is causing me to question something I have believed in since the beginning of this show. She is causing me to question RAINBOWS AND UNICORNS. And I hate her for that. Stefan is way too good for her. But he will keep torturing himself to become her guy again. And it hurts me to watch it. Because Elena will still keep giving him her judgy side eye no matter what he does at this point.
Dayna: Excuse me, Stefan — the guy who rips people apart and doesn’t really take full responsibility for it because he’s “an addict and can’t control it” — is too good for her? I just don’t get this at all. Feeling bad about it afterward isn’t enough. Damon is absolutely right about him needing to acknowledge his own nature and get control over it rather than the on-the-wagon off-the-wagon stuff that he has proven time and again doesn’t work. But Damon’s the “bad guy.”
Stephanie: Word my fellow Damon lover. Damon did exactly what he needed to in order to make Elena acknowledge that Stefan is a vampire. I mean, I know her reading comprehension is lacking but I figure vampire=blood drinking is an easy deduction.
Erin:I am not afraid to admit it: Stefan gets to do what ever he wants without getting any hate from me. I get disappointed in him but I will always root for him. I have a bit of bias in this area.
Cin: I think I’m Stefan biased too. I like him bad, I like him good, I like him naked, etc. I don’t necessarily think he’s too good for Elena, I just don’t want to see or think about them together anymore because I don’t want to look at Elena more than I have to. I want Stefan with someone different. I’d like to see him in a real relationship with someone other than Elena to see how he acts.
Serial Killer Legacy
Christina: I have to say that this was my favorite story line of the night. I think it’s legit interesting. And that mirror shit at the very beginning was kind of awesome, no? I mean aside from the fact that we learned that Matt Davis has an amazingly symmetrical face.
Stephanie: Word to favorite storyline of the night (Matt Davis was/is AMAZING) and yes to amazing face symmetry. If you’re staring at yourself for an hour it’d suck to notice your face is all fucked up. I’d leave that tube so annoyed that genetics and evolution didn’t love me enough to want me to have desirable reproductive qualities like a symmetrical face.
Christina: Hahaha word. Plus, you know… having to stare at myself is uncomfortable anyway. Even *I* don’t want to look too deeply into my soul.
Dayna: I thought the mirror thing in the MRI tube had to be bullshit, but my husband said they do in fact have them in some MRIs. I can’t imagine why anyone wants to stare at their own face while they are having a claustrophobic freakout, but whatever. Shouldn’t he have been in a johnny, though? Somehow I don’t think MRIs and zippers mix very well.
Cin: His face freaked me out. No lie it made me question his handsomeness and when it like stayed still and he was being all messing up the MRI machine with his wild gesturing, I was straight up rattled. That said, I do agree with Christina. The plot was a nice change of pace but this episode was overall so poor AND this entire plot line has been kinda thrust on the audience… I don’t know. I like it but I don’t appreciate it I guess. No, that’s not right either. I’m MAD at Elena’s reaction to it.
Christina: Wait, hold up. It made you QUESTION his handsomeness? According to my wikipedia research (actually, I only found it because I remember it from the psychology classes I’ve taken), symmetrical faces make people MORE attractive/handsome. This is interesting… THAT said, word, dude. Elena’s reaction? Double-standardy. (It’s a word NOW, bitches). Anyway, Elena forgotten for a moment… back to the storyline I found the most interesting… I kind of loved that he left the file for Jeremy to continue his killings. I mean… I legit LOL’d out of joy. I love a crazy character, y’all.
Erin: I can’t believe how stoked I was just to see Jer’s face. Didn’t realize I had missed him at all. How sweet would it be to watch him do some of this stuff that Serialaric has been doing? Crazy Jer!! I’m down! And we think Elena is forgiving now……
Cin: Totally, Erin! I got a small Jerm rush too. It was way weird and I also was like ‘Please have him like walk over to serial killer wall and give a sly grin’ How awesome would THAT have been. LOL
Dayna: That? Would have been THE SHIT.
Stephanie: Yes I’m going to need Jeremy the Vampire Slayer/future mental patient to come back and start wielding that butcher knife like Alice from the Brady Brunch trying to hack up enough meat to feed that 1960s Duggar family.
Cin: ROFL! I love you Steph!
Christina: You guys. You know what I just realized? I wonder if this is the Meredith-Mental Hospital book connection… Are we going to find out that someone in the Fell family had these rings and ended up in the looney bin too?
Stephanie: Never read the books but what if Meredith is psychotic and not a real doctor. Maybe she just forged the transcripts, watched a little too much House, and bribed the hospital with her family name to get the job. Or perhaps me tuning into the Pretty Little Liars finale has warped my mind.
Christina: So… in Elena’s eyes, being a serial killer is totally fine when it’s someone she loves and that person is human. But Stefan does it 90 years ago? SHUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!
Dayna: Well, she hasn’t so much shunned Stefan. She’s still all “you can get control” and shit. Nevermind the ripping and reassembling of people he was doing just A FEW MONTHS ago. Since she’s Elena, I can see her thinking that because it was the Gilbert rings she wants to help him get over the being a multiple-personality serial killer.
Christina: Yeah, maybe. It still just hit me as very odd. But more than shunning or not shunning… she has a Problem with a capital P with Stefan being a serial killer, but she’s taking Alaric’s stabby tendencies in stride. Like, “oh, no biggie. He kills people.” It just felt double-standardy to me.
Dayna: I would argue that she gives Stefan A LOT of slack, but anyway, I can see her being more understanding toward Alaric since he’s kinda gone cray-cray and is not just making a decision to kill people because he feels like it, which is how she views vamps like Damon.
Cin: Her acceptance of this plot is the straw that broke the camel’s back between me and Elena. I understand she has no one – but how is she better than any of the vampires she judges if she is destroying evidence against a serial murderer? (Dayna just asked me what I meant in our side chat and in case you missed it: the note Serialaric left for Jeremy about finishing his work and basically CONFESSING to the crimes, she crumpled it up. Stefan looked at her like she’d lost her f-ing mind) If she still loves him and puts HIS protection above the concern of every human on that kill list? On the Alaric front it was good development, but I can totally see how they are gearing up for Matt Davis to leave in case his show gets picked up (or not), but Elena: YOU CANNOT JUDGE STEFAN FOR SNACKING ON A COMPELLED HUMAN AND THEN DESTROY EVIDENCE AGAINST A HUMAN SERIAL KILLER. I don’t care if ‘he’s all I have left’. Whatthefuckever. My problem is that Elena is condoning this out of one eye and judging Stefan and Damon out of her other eye. She has become what made everyone hate Bonnie. And I just can’t abide by it.
Erin: THANK YOU CIN!!! JeSUS. I think everyone is forgetting that Stefan was totally in control of all his shit there for a while and gave it up for Damon. So is it ok that Damon gets some of the blame while he gets back on track? I think so. Obviously Klaus gets some of that too and no one is holding Stefan completely blameless. Alaric needs to be locked up until they are sure this is all settled. Is that so bad? A little bit of jail time?
Dayna: I don’t see it the same way. I can see her wanting to help Alaric, partially because she feels a little responsible because of the Gilbert ring and partially because it’s not “Alaric” being in control of his actions. AND, it’s been established on the this show that supernatural shenanigans aren’t really handled the same way mundane things are, so throwing him in jail isn’t so much a solution to the problem. I mean, it would keep him from killing anyone else until they can get him straightened out, but it’s not going to resolve anything. It just seems pretty in character for Elena to me. I have a bigger problem with her giving Stefan a pass because he’s “an addict” and blaming Damon for everything.
Stephanie: Dayna, you speak for me.
Cin: I have a problem with that for sure, and I see what you are saying about having some of the blame about Alaric’s ‘condition’ but I still don’t excuse how she is handling it. And I agree with Erin, Alaric should be watched closely by someone like Damon for an extended period of time until we are sure this particular Deux Ex Machina works out for them. MY issue is her being so two faced about her judgement. Total Bonnie move. And I totally can’t stand that shit.
Dayna: With Bonnie, she’s judging people about doing the same thing she’s doing herself. i.e. what she did to Luka compared to what vampires do to people. Elena isn’t doing the killing herself. I dunno, I just don’t see it the way y’all do. Agree to disagree and all that.
Cin: And that’s fine too. I guess I have just had my fill of her being so sanctimonious with the brothers. I see your point though. I guess after Matt pretty much called her out on all that stuff last week and made her confront her deal with the vampires to see her still doing the same things just started making my eye twitch.
Christina: Dayna, I definitely see your points here. And I absolutely agree with you that it is IN CHARACTER for Elena to be judgey like this. I’m not arguing that. What I have a problem with IS her character. The entire episode, I just kept feeling like she was excusing Alaric COMPLETELY from everything. I don’t care if he’s not himself. Stefan is not himself. Doesn’t she SEE how much he is struggling to try to get back to the Stefan that she fell in love with? He doesn’t like being RIPPAH as much as the audience does. And yet, Damon gets him to drink, to learn moderation, and she sees it and she’s all judgmental about it again. And then later, there she is destroying evidence and basically all “there there-ing” Alaric. I’m just… I’ve been tired of Elena’s judginess for a while. She’s definitely not as bad as Bonnie is — I still hate her with the fires of 1,000 suns, but Elena is irking me for real. I don’t think I could be friends with her if she was a real person. I’d seriously only be Caroline’s friend at this point. Then again, if I valued my life at all, I’d break all ties and get the fuck out of dodge, though.
Threesome of Deceit
Christina: Someone just needs to kill Sage already. Please. I hope she dies like INCHES away from DPR’s arms. Just so it sucks THAT much more for her.
Dayna: She really is AWFUL. And Finn? Really?! Do. Not. Get. It.
Stephanie: I liked Sage last week but this week she can die. I just can’t get behind anyone who chooses Finn as their one and only. However, you know she’d like him from behind.
Erin: Man. I thought I hated Rose. This chick though. Yikes. Kind of want to go ripper on her myself. What is it about her that makes me hate her so much? She even has me sticking up for Rebekah who I have LOATHED in the past!!!
Cin: I didn’t hate Rose and I don’t hate Sage. Not at all. I question her sanity with the whole Finn thing, but I like her. Legit like her. And maybe that’s partially because I love Cassidy Freeman so much but I don’t even care. Working Damon over is always appreciated. Even though I enjoyed him more last night than I usually do too. I straight up said to Christina over BBM ‘I like Damon better when he’s not playing Elena games’. He’s how he should be. He was fun last week and he was kinda fun this week. Manipulating and being all deceitful with other undead characters. Power plays. That’s what I like to see.
Christina: I’m not entirely sure what happened, but this kind of stuff, with his sexy parties… this interested and amused me last season. I didn’t like Rose, and I didn’t really care either way for Andie, but Damon being Playful Damon was good. But now… I just… I hate it. I hate Sage. I thought I hated Rebekah, but lordy, I done got learned when Sage came to town. I don’t hate Rebekah. I hate Sage. And I hope she dies. Oooh. Maybe DPR will kill her! That’d be kind of awesome actually. He’s a mama’s boy anyway. What does she want with him? ANYWAY, yeah, I just don’t find this Damon interesting either. And all it’s doing is giving him ideas. Terrible, horrible, no good, very bad ideas.
Cin: I totally agree. The DPR connection is my kink in the armor with her – but she is fun and smart and like the Originals and Katherine I like it when the big dogs come out to play.
Christina: Oh, I like that she’s all powerful and she could probably knock Damon down a peg or two, but I really, REALLY do not care if she lives or dies. I mean… she’s upset at Klaus and Rebekah for treating her like a “peasant whore,” so she wants revenge. I’m sorry, bitch. Not on MY watch! She wants to take the Originals down? Well, then, someone better take her out before she can do it. The Originals are better than she is, hands down. They win for me. Every time. So, she is no better than an ant to me.
Dayna: You know, though, now that we’ve met Sage, it kinda explains the whole Finn has suicidal ideation thing.
Dayna: Maybe Bonnie and Klaus should get together for a few drinks and compare. Her mother has now abandoned her not once, but twice. I mean, not that I’d want to spend any time with Bonnie either, but still. Burn! I guess Jamie will be tagging along back to Mystic Falls, now that he’s parentless too?
Cin: Sure he will. They need more killable humans around. *yawn*
Christina: God, I just… I don’t even care. Not even a little bit. Abby is a terrible person, a terrible mother. She’s a quitter. And I’m going to be on Bonnie’s side with this. She doesn’t need her. She’s better off without her. She and Jamie can be all… “the best family is MADE!” together. Abby can go die. But… honestly. Meh.
Erin: Abby sucks!! Not gonna miss her ass at all. Goodbye Abby. Don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.
Stephanie: Abby can go to Abbey Road and get hit by a double decker bus for all I care. She’s just the worst and so BLAH.
Dayna: It will just hustle in the Bonnie S4 Big Bad storyline that much faster.
Cin: No. I cannot handle Bonnie being a Big Bad. Because I hate her and every time she is on screen I want to claw my eyes out. If she were interesting like Willow was it might work, but lets be honest – most of the fandom didn’t think it worked on BtVS either (I personally never had S6 issues) and we all loved Willow and welcomed her getting the big plots.
Dayna: I will forever love Season 6, if only because it gave me Buffy: The Musical.
Cin: And Spuffy sex. Can’t forget the sexing. *nods*
The Acme Anvil Company
Dayna: Whoa, I hope no one was under that huge anvil they dropped w/r/t Alaric’s cray-cray being the same thing that happens to witches who use black magic too much. I’m guessing Bonnie is being set up to be the Season 4 Big Bad, a la Evil Willow?
Christina: I just hope they kill her.
Stephanie: Look, I know they need a witch but they need to kill Bonnie so bad. She has had no development and is so boring/annoying to watch. If we can’t kill her can we at least bring back and exchange her for Lucy. I liked Lucy.
Cin: Word. I liked Lucy and Gloria was pretty sassy and competent too. The point is, there are other witches in the sea. WHY ARE WE STUCK WITH BONBON?!?
Dayna: I kinda wonder at this point if the only reason they’re NOT killing off a character who obviously doesn’t work is that they don’t want to unleash the shitstorm of killing off the show’s only series regular minority.
Cin: They they need to bring a few more in and let them take over BEFORE killing her. I’m all for that. But having her around just to fill that slot is past not working out. It’s painful to behold.
Stephanie: Plus, I think Kat Graham is growing restless in this role because she even knows that the character sucks. BRING IN MORE WITCHES AND GET LIL’ BONNIE FUFU OUT OF HERE.
Dayna: At this point, I heartily approve of ANY storyline that gives an excuse to kill off Bonnie. Lucy was okay. She can come back if she wants.
Stephanie: Let’s enrage the Bonnie lovers and start a campaign to swap Bonnie for Lucy. It can be called Operation Bonnie Freedom.
Dayna: Or, you know. Operation: Witch With An Actual Personality.
Stephanie: LOL. Or how about Operation: Boring Bitches Go To Narnia and Never Return.
Dayna: Do we really want to wish that on Narnia?
Stephanie: They have a talking lion as king. I don’t think it can get much worse there. Besides, it’s not like we’re banishing her to the Shire. She’d judge Frodo to harshly.
Cin: No f-ing way is she Shire worthy. Mordor possibly.
From the Tweetosphere
@thomascgalvin: Best possible outcome: Rebekah murders Sage and bangs Damon for the rest of the episode. #tvd
@TriniJax: 1. I hate Elena. 2. Why don’t I like Meredith? 3. I hate Elena #TVD
@B_inShortsville: Sage looks so much like Ann-Margaret my Dad is prolly rubbing one out in his grave #tvd
@thomascgalvin: “Hi, my name is Sage. My interests include rape, wooden acting, and rape. I <3 circus peanuts!” #tvd
@B_inShortsville: Bonnie: Alaric have a ratty old pair of tighty whities I can use? #tvd
@37ft2in: I feel like #tvd is one long episode of Captain Obvious tonight.
@AndySwift: It looks like Paul Wesley’s husband senses are tingling. “My wife! She is in troublez!” #TVD
@thomascgalvin: Even Bonnie’s mom doesn’t want to hang out with her. #tvd